Thanks for sticking with me and hopefully now I can explain a little more behind the purpose of these musings. I mentioned in my first post this idea of SingleLove. Now, I know what you’re thinking, first “what is that? “And second, “Blaynejohn, you really like to make up your own terms?” (yes, you are right on that, I do like to make up my own terms) You’re also probably thinking that it has to do with your relationship status and being single, right? …actually no.

SingleLove is a concept of action. It is the action of learning to have a single love and value for yourself that only you can give that can’t be fulfilled by another person, relationships or by things. So whether you are in a relationship or not, there is a deep need to love yourself. Why? Because once you learn to have a single love for yourself it helps you to know how to love others and opens you up to being loved by a loving God who has an everlasting love for you his beloved creation. (That’s a lot of love in one sentence!) Having SingleLove is a great complement to receiving God’s love that fills the God-shaped hole in our hearts and makes us feel complete.

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing loving-kindness.” – Jeremiah 31:3

Truly Love Yourself, so You can Love Others Truly:  If you are at a place where you don’t love yourself, then it is hard for you to understand what it then means to truly love others better than you love yourself because the idea of the love that you have for yourself at that point is tainted. So if you self-depreciate or think negatively about yourself, or don’t value who you are because of the lack of love and appreciation that you have for yourself, then this is how you will approach your love for others…it will be an unforgiving, unappreciative, and conditional kind of love.

Love is Unconditional: Love needs to start internally or inward in order to then be reflected upward to God and outward to others. It is unconditional. For some loving unconditionally may come easier for others than it is for ourselves. Things happen in our lives in which we are ashamed of, feel disappointed about, feel like we have failed, or that whatever we do is not good enough. We need to learn to have grace with ourselves and forgive ourselves when we feel like we messed up…then let go and move on. It’s good to remember and learn from our mistakes, but to not let it hold us back from moving forward. In order to move forward, we have to let go of the past. Love others unconditionally with dignity and respect and learn to love yourself unconditionally with dignity and respect.

Love provides Confidence: When you love yourself then you are confident in who you are and do not need validation or approval from others to feel confident. Be comfortable in your own skin and in who God created you to be, and don’t allow anyone to let you think any less.

Love is an Identity: You are God’s Beloved. When you realize how much God loves you just the way he created you, then nothing is going to be able to hold you back from becoming who God destined you to be.

Love is Made Perfect through Christ: We are imperfect people and God’s love for us was made perfect through Christ, so that we can love ourselves and others with Christ’s perfect love instead of with our imperfect love.

Challenge: If you are ever in need of reminding yourself what love looks like for yourself and others refer to Corinthians 13:4-8. Post these verses somewhere you can see them daily like on your bathroom mirror, stick them in your wallet, or write them in your journal.